Of Relationships and Regrets
One of the more painful experiences a parent has is watching their young enter into and exit from relationships. It doesn't matter the gender or the age, the pain they experience appears to be expotentially increased for the parental unit observing it. I have yet to feel anything burn worse than the tears of my child on my neck as I hug them close or more painful than the tortured looks brought on by their hearts breaking. Can anything stir your ire as quickly as seeing them hurt by another's insensitivity?
I would love to give them advice on how to protect their hearts, shroud their feelings, guarding against such relational inspired maiming but sadly I have nothing to give because when it comes to my past relationships... let's just say I wouldn't be batting cleanup.
Those failures of mine have been gracious enough to bring a truck load of regret along with them that keep me second guessing life, love, and relationships in general. However, to dwell in those regrets is die a rather slow inconsequential death that only lends itself to self pity and whining.
Luckily I have been blessed with a guide who has enlightened me on such matters. My mentor has shown me that when it comes to the affairs of the heart, to avoid pain through protecting and masking your own heart, you have robbed yourself of any chance to experience the best of life. Like baseball you can avoid the humiliation of striking out by never going to the plate to take a pitch... but by doing so you have cheated yourself out of the thrill of hitting one out of the park.
So I can only stand by and watch my offspring go to the plate of relationships and give it their best shot. They may strike out. They may only get to first base. They might even hit the big one and experience the euphoria of a true love, an actual soulmate.
As for the parental spectator, I guess all we can do is to be ready to applaud or comfort them when their time at the plate is through. That my friend is freakin' hard.
I would love to give them advice on how to protect their hearts, shroud their feelings, guarding against such relational inspired maiming but sadly I have nothing to give because when it comes to my past relationships... let's just say I wouldn't be batting cleanup.
Those failures of mine have been gracious enough to bring a truck load of regret along with them that keep me second guessing life, love, and relationships in general. However, to dwell in those regrets is die a rather slow inconsequential death that only lends itself to self pity and whining.
Luckily I have been blessed with a guide who has enlightened me on such matters. My mentor has shown me that when it comes to the affairs of the heart, to avoid pain through protecting and masking your own heart, you have robbed yourself of any chance to experience the best of life. Like baseball you can avoid the humiliation of striking out by never going to the plate to take a pitch... but by doing so you have cheated yourself out of the thrill of hitting one out of the park.
So I can only stand by and watch my offspring go to the plate of relationships and give it their best shot. They may strike out. They may only get to first base. They might even hit the big one and experience the euphoria of a true love, an actual soulmate.
As for the parental spectator, I guess all we can do is to be ready to applaud or comfort them when their time at the plate is through. That my friend is freakin' hard.
Labels: Life
posted by Frustrated Writer | 10:12 PM
2 Comments:
it is hard, and from experience I can tell you that without my mother, I never would have gotten past the pain.
your children are blessed to have such a wonderful father.
Being aware of the urge to protect and also knowing that it is important to take chances makes your advice and support all the more valuable.
And I also had to smile at the fact you used the baseball analogy in a different way to talk about love. I like this way much more.
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