Your New and Improved Social Security Office

I took a friend to the SS office yesterday and we were surprised to watch a lady walk into the building with a 40 oz. beer in her hand. Now I know the SS office is boasting a "friendlier and more accessible" atmosphere but oh my, they have really taken it to a whole new level. (We later decided she was actually throwing the bottle away, but for the purposes of this blog, I'll assume she was taking a swig or two from it as it was about 2/3 empty...)

It occurred to me there are multiple reasons they allow the beer in the office now:

1. It helps pass the time while you wait for an eternity to be served.

2. It makes that first rejection a little easier.

3. You can share some with the ultra-bored security officer who only passion in life is to play with all the locks in the office.

4. If someone happens to go ballistic, you know have a weapon in which to a) subdue them or b) throw at them as you run for the door.

5. Maybe it was being used for proof that the person is having to take beer for medicinal purposes.

6. It also might be SS's way of replacing Medicaid. "You do need some help so here is your 40 oz. for the day. Drink it quick and you'll forget all about your problems."

7. I would think the ultimate reason they would allow a 40 oz. into the SS office is for you to share a nip or two with the case officer who could probably use a drink about 2 in the afternoon...

Then I started to think of other government offices that should probably allow, no, supply 40 oz. bottles of beer to patrons.

1. The Post Office during the Christmas season. It would sure keep the grumbling down.

2. The DMV. Let's face it, you could consume two of those bad boys by the time they get to you and my, wouldn't your driver's license picture be much more fun to look at?

3. The Foodstamp office. It would be sort of cutting the middle man out for some folks, now wouldn't it?

4. The Health Clinic. Hey, I know I could use one before facing the needle. Sigh.

5. HUD. Would you really be all that upset with whatever house they gave you after #2 bottle had been consumed?

Maybe yesterday's woman was a trend setter, no, a pioneer of the times when it comes to dealing with the government. Perhaps we should put her face on the next dollar coin...